


it's still you (no, it isn't)

by PlunnyBait13



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: -...i think??, Gen, I Don't Even Know, Memory Alteration, Why Did I Write This?, oh right, phrase got stuck in my brain, universe shenanigans, word vomit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-02
Updated: 2019-01-02
Packaged: 2019-10-02 14:10:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17265599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlunnyBait13/pseuds/PlunnyBait13
Summary: His memories are getting fuzzy.(These aren't his memories anyway.)





	it's still you (no, it isn't)

**Author's Note:**

> had the phrase 'phantom pains' stuck in my mind, it somehow evolved into this, idk how, it just did
> 
> this is mostly word vomit anyway

Sometimes there are phantom pains on his wrists.

Sometimes when he slouches, an unfathomable electric pain flares up in his back and he yelps.

Sometimes he gets overwhelmed from the crowds. Voices in his head laughing and _mocking_ his insecurities. Insecurities that he locked up tightly in the furthest part of his mind.

Sometimes it feels like him and Evan's positions are reversed.

Sometimes he calls Evan by a different name. Associates him with reds instead of blues, with brazen 90's passion instead of the anxious, mousy exterior. It's weird, but not _the_ weirdest.

Because for some fucking reason, fucking Keanu Reeves _-of all the fucking amalgamations his brain could conjure, it picked Keanu Reeves? The hell?!-_ would haunt his dreams and whisper how everything about him was _so, so terrible_. It shouldn't bother him but somehow it hurt him a lot, hurt him more than it should have.

Sometimes he forgets who he is. Doesn't recognize his name as his own and he wonders if he has, like, some type of mental disorder or something. He doesn't really know.

He was Jared _goddamn_ Kleinman, not _"Jeremy Heere"_. And no ~~nightmares~~ weird dreams or phantom pains would say otherwise.

(He was scared, loathed he was to admit it. But the line seperating the two kept getting blurred by the second. He didn't want this. He wished he could just wake up like normal and wave everything off as just a random glitch in the universe.

But with his luck, _his karma?_ He doubted he would be let off the hook _that_ easy.)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Linked, Not Synced](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18569152) by [ShiningDiamonds9](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShiningDiamonds9/pseuds/ShiningDiamonds9)




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